Girls Rock! Des Moines (GR!DSM) has been on my radar for quite some time. Studio One held a workshop about live broadcasting for their students in 2023, but even before then, I’ve always admired the work they’ve done to empower and inspire confidence in local youth through music education.
So when I learned that GR!DSM taught adults how to start rock bands at their We Rock retreat, I knew I needed to give it a shot. Music is my life, but as a professional DJ and music journalist, I always say I have taste, not talent. This was an opportunity to get out of my comfort zone and prove to myself I could be a performer, too. And so, despite some stage fright, I signed up.
I went into my We Rock adventure knowing very little about making music, but I kept an open mind and, by the end of the retreat, found myself as the frontwoman of a band full of brilliant musicians. It was quite the confidence boost to let loose and rock out.
Day One
The first two days of We Rock were held after work. The retreat kicked off with introductions, ice breakers and a rundown of how We Rock operates. Together, we made a list of “camp agreements” meant to create a safe and supportive creative environment.
We then dove right in to the part that I had the most anxiety about: picking bandmates. I was so nervous that nobody would want someone as clueless as me in their band, but I quickly learned that We Rock was a much more inclusive and beginner-friendly environment than that. I quickly found my ideal group: Izzy Marx, GR!DSM operations director and Munk Rivers percussionist on drums, IPR contributing photographer Brittany Brooke Crow on bass, Maddy Boehme on electric guitar, LJ Hoffman on auxiliary percussion — and yours truly on vocals and keys.
I did not go into We Rock thinking I'd be a frontwoman, but we needed somebody to fill the position. I might have limited singing ability, but I've got a whole lot of gumption, so without overthinking it (or knowing what else I'd be struggling through), I volunteered.
We separated by instruments for lessons. Programming director Taylor Raibikis led my group of singers and keyboardists. I remembered a little bit of the basics from my childhood piano lessons, so I felt confident I could pick up a simple keyboard part for the band. But then I was introduced to an instrument I had never seen before: the keytar. I had no experience and was certain I needed to stick to a simple instrument, but the idea of a rock band singer with a keytar in hand seemed pretty cool to me. This was my opportunity to push myself after all, so — why not?
Now prepped with members, instruments and a band name — Unsteady Betty — our assignment for the remainder of the weekend was to prepare two songs for our Sunday showcase: one cover and one original.
We scribbled down some ideas for the original but figured we should ease into it by practicing our cover, “Still Into You,” by Paramore. As the day wrapped, I was feeling the weight of learning how to write music, play an instrument for the first time and perform as the lead singer in front of an audience. But, that's what this experience was all about — pushing myself out of my comfort zone. So, it was time to work through my nerves.
Day Two
Turns out, I had trouble working through my nerves.
I couldn't sleep that well, so I stayed up and wrote down the words to a potential song, which I shared with my bandmates at the start of Day Two. They were totally on board with the lyrics, so we made fast progress during the songwriting workshop. The workshop also taught me some helpful composition tips, including to focus on W-H-I-M: Words, Harmony, Instrumentation and Melody. It was time to turn those lyrics into music.
Our cover song was in the key of F, played with drop D tuning, so we decided to stick to that to avoid re-tuning on stage. As a group, we figured out a chord progression based on that key and the rhythm of the lyrics. We took that rough structure with us to our instrument lesson time, which was where we hashed out our individual parts.
During lesson time, I quickly realized that I may have been too confident in my ability to pick up the keytar. I found it difficult to play while singing, and I had no idea where the keys were without constantly looking down. But, I had already dedicated myself to the vision of a frontwoman on keytar, so I stuck with it and created my own "cheat sheet" by putting note stickers on the back of the keys.
Meanwhile, Allegra Hernandez, director of GR!DSM’s GR!T Records Studio, spent time working with Crow and Boehme on their parts for our original piece. Marx, being a drum teacher by trade, already knew how to play a punk rock beat on the drumset, so she used the time to teach percussion to other attendees.
After a soup potluck, we spent the evening putting together the parts we'd written for our original song. I was anxious about how we would create a composition out of seemingly thin air, but our ideas started to gel, and pretty soon — we had a working song.
Day One I went home feeling overwhelmed. But after Day Two, I was so pumped up that I didn’t want to stop practicing. I immediately downloaded a free piano app on my phone so I could keep going. Not only was my band counting on me, but I wanted to learn how to write a good song.
Day Three
Saturday was a full day spent at the GR!DSM headquarters. We began with zine-making, a GR!DSM tradition and a fun way to shift into focus for the day ahead.
Then we focused on our bands. Boehme and Crow put a lot of work into perfecting the guitar solo for our original song, and Hoffman experimented with unique instruments like the cowbell. I sat in front of a piano (much easier to play than the keytar), where I tried to nail down the melody I had written and commit it to memory. The repetition over our few hours of practice transformed our scattered ideas into a fully-realized composition.
With my lack of experience, I thought I would never get to a point where I felt good about performing, but by the end of the day, I really felt like I could. The encouragement I got from others helped a lot, but it was mostly the virtuosity of my bandmates that inspired me to try hard.
The day wrapped with a dress rehearsal with all the We Rock bands. I was blown away by everyone's original songs, especially since most of the participants were just as new to music-making as I was. We had all learned instruments, created completely new compositions and had become performance-ready in just a few days. Not only that, but there wasn’t a single unkind soul in attendance. It was a supportive, uplifting and confidence-building environment, and it was inspiring.
Day Four
My anticipation and excitement was high on the day of the showcase — I was about to perform in front of an audience after a whirlwind three days of practice. We arrived and ran through soundcheck, which was a whole new experience for me as well. I've watched countless soundchecks throughout my career, but this was my first time participating in one as a performer. Then, the doors opened, and the crowd started streaming in.
Raibikis welcomed concertgoers to our showcase and introduced the first band on the bill — Unsteady Betty.
We opened with “Still Into You,” which has a few parts with background vocals. I was pretty nervous — singing that song in front of an audience was far out of my comfort zone — but to help, I asked the audience to sing along. Before I knew it, the crowd was dancing and singing along with me, which did a lot to calm my nerves. I was really having a fun time!
Then, we went into our original piece. It was a punk rock protest song — very fast and wordy. I tried my best to sound as raucous and aggravated as possible and the audience was enthusiastically moshing throughout. I left that stage with a giant grin on my face.
The rest of the concert was a blur, but I can say the other bands were sensational. Hot Mess followed us with their original song, "Fever Dream," an infectious pop track that suited their vocalist Ari's voice flawlessly. The band Gender Matters came next with their original track, "Before Gay Was Queer," a piece inspired by the singular "they" pronoun, which I learned has been in use since at least the 1300s. BPM closed out the show with three songs. Their original, "Joyous Resistance," was sung by Jillian Wells (who had encouraged me to pick up the keytar). It was one of my favorite songs of the day, and was a perfect way to sum up how liberating it felt to be so vulnerable as a first-time rock band musician.
Final thoughts
Performing in a rock band for the first time was so much fun, and the amount of joy felt that Sunday afternoon was incredible. I honestly don’t know if I’ve ever been in such an uplifting environment in my adult life. It was a much-needed, refreshing break from normal life.
Naturally, I messed up countless times, but I didn't care about those mistakes one bit. I had just done something I thought I would never do and it felt like such an accomplishment. It was so exhilarating to create music and perform it with my new friends. I can see why people want to do this all the time!
Many people dream of becoming rockstars, but for most of us, those dreams never come true. That’s not the case with GR!DSM. So much work is put into making GR!DSM camps fun, educational and inspirational, and that effort does not go unnoticed. GR!DSM is an invaluable part of our local music community, and having been through the program, I would absolutely recommend sending children to rock band camp with them.
But I wouldn't stop there. The confidence boost I felt from this experience was priceless. I'd also recommend the WeRock retreat for adults too! The great thing about the We Rock retreat is that it really brings home the idea that there is no such thing as "too late" to start your journey as a musician. I’m grateful for the supportive and inclusive environment GR!DSM provides for adult learners like me.
It looks like I’m in the market for a new keyboard! And who knows — maybe I’ll see you at the next We Rock!
